First of all, the image on this post is a quick sketch I did when a coworker asked me to draw a smoking tree. Since I haven't even finished a color cube doodle this week or had the time for anything else I figured it would be an apt image for the insanity that was the end of May and beginning of June.
Last week I was scheduled for 72 hours at work and then on my one off day I had an interview.
The interview was embarrassingly awful. Epic proportions of humiliation. And also, I got some good I ideas for how to improve myself and my skillset. I might be a bit disheartened, but I am stuck in my job for at least a while longer. I steeled myself for my usual 36 hour weekend, but on Friday got news that my aunt had passed. I left a few hours early to go be with my Mom and was able to take a half day on Sunday to go with her and my cousin to make arrangements. It was wonderful to see my cousin as he is my fav person in my extended family by far. Today, Monday June 3rd - we were supposed to go to my aunts apartment and try to see if she had a will, as well as find anything that the family would like to keep before the apartment complex cleans it out. I know this will be emotional for my mom. BUT - then I got paged in. So I am now here at work for another day and dreading that my only day off without being on pager is tomorrow. And now tomorrow Mom and I are going to the apt. Next week I work 6 12hr days and one 6hr day.
I know I am just shouting in the void, but I am exhausted. I feel broken and overwhelmed. I still have no washer and dryer. The one I ordered was delivered faulty, and because of demand and my work schedule it will not be here until the 17th of June.
In my usual effort to combat my woes I got myself the new apple pencil pro for my ipad but it's incompatible. But my brain is doing the thing where it now wants the new ipad that will work with it because it has a new rotation feature that could be LIFE CHANGING when doing some digital work. I know I shouldn't. But I want to so badly and keep trying to make it work.
Help, I need thoughts and prayers to stay responsible.
So life has been mostly work and pain. Tomorrow on my only true day off I am going to have to do laundry and clean and take Mom to my Aunt's apartment - and then more work!
It's going to be a long summer. But at least by the end of it my washer and dryer will be here and mostly paid off.
Its still no reason to buy the ipad. lol
Hopefully more updates soon as I get back on my feet and doing more than surviving. Much love to anyone who finds this. Find something beautiful in the day. Do something kind. Go outside. Drink more water.
And do the creative thing you want to do.
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